Come in, I have been waiting for you.
Hahahahaha… (sound effects of laughing trailing into the background)
Okay I didn’t have time to put in the sound effects, so just imagine…
Anyway, I am glad you are back & as they say “Good Things come in Twos” or is that “Good Things come in Pairs”. Wait, it might be “Bad Things come in Twos. No, it’s “Bad Things come in Threes”. Oh well, will somebody google that for me & let me know. I don’t believe in that anyway.
But I do believe that because you are here, all is well & good. Mabuhay!
Now, this might be a series, I don’t know. But who cares anyway right?
So for today I would like to think (out loud) about Women. Particularly women drivers. Wait before you say that I am sexist or I am discriminating. Wait I might be. Didn’t I just tell you that yesterday in “Diskriminasyon 1”?
Okay to say it nicely, I have discriminating taste. There you go. But before anything else I have to say that I do not have any bad blood with women. In fact I have a series going on about women, Filipino Women that is. So please do not jump into the conclusion that I have something against women. I don’t, specially not against a particular woman.
Okay, okay not about women, but just these women in particular.
And I am talking about certain lady drivers. And I will tell you why. About 5 or 6 days ago, let’s say a week ago. I was leisurely driving to Gardena, California. And to do that I have to travel a considerable distance for I have to pass by one, two, three, four, five cities. Well, I could take the freeway but it was morning rush hour & you know how it is in LA. In case you don’t, just think about EDSA on monday morning 8AM. And I wasn’t in a hurry & so I decided to drive like an older person (which I am one) & to drive in the second lane or the slow lane & drive at the speed limit or a little bit above it, how much more I wouldn’t tell you. It’s between me & the Lord. I have a clean DMV driving record & mind you, I drive wisely, defensively & logically.
Okay so I go off driving about say close to 8 AM on a weekday. Most if not all the streets that I will be driving at will be two lane streets, with a rightmost lane for parking &/or making a right turn and a middle lane to make a left on.
And so what do I notice this fine morning, in my rear view mirrow? Somebody driving erratically behind me & I see a silhoute (I hope I speled that right) or an outline of a driver with hair coming up & to side like somebody who just got electrocuted with a thousand volts of electricity.
And then I looked & I looked again, it was indeed somebody driving erratically. So I just maintained my speed as I am trying to see what this driver wanted to do. And so she did, she finally changed lanes & overtook me & as she passed by, yes she was a she. And yes she had that frizzy electrocuted hair look, or whatever you want to call that. And as she passed, what do I notice? Yes, she was busy talking with someone on her cell phone. Yes, with one hand holding the phone to her ear. Looking very upset too if you asked me.
Then I’m back to my driving. But wait here comes another car closing in on me. I have just changed lanes myself & I am at the left lane (1st lane) as I will be making a left turn.
Then as I look back, I see my worse nightmare come to life. Another lady driver, this time she was putting on makeup as she was driving. Okay, I see that all the time (normally at traffic stops) & it just doesn’t really bother me. But hello, now that there is a law prohibiting cellphone use while driving why would the law still allow drivers to put on makeup while driving?
Tell me why? To me, that’s even worse that texting.
And the worst part was she was putting on EYE makeup. Imagine that one foot on the accelerator pedal, one hand on the wheel, the other hand holding a mascara stick or whatever you call that thing you use to put eye makeup on. And both eyes on the rear view mirror looking to see if she had put the makeup just right. And her mind, of course we know where her mind is, 100% focused on putting on the eye makeup perfectly.
Okay, we know women can multi-task but do not tell me that if I was to make a sudden stop because of some thing ahead me, would there be enough time for the driver behind me to make a safe stop without colliding with my rear end? And she was really close.
Of course I have to put a little more distance between me & the driver ahead of me but then when I did that the lady driver makeup artist behind me was getting closer & closer to me. So I was between a rock & a hard place.
Okay that’s 2-0.
And then I was able to get through with that & we move on my happy trip.
I moved to the slow lane again (right lane) as I wanted to drive at the speed limit & I will be making a right in about a few stop signals anyway.
And what do I see next as I was looking to my right hand side mirror preparing to see if I can move to the rightmost lane to make a (safe) right. Another car moving fast behind me, on my right side. Not the passing side mind you. And then as the car was beside me, who do I see inside driving. Yes another lady driver. She zooms in on my right & she had that road rage look in her as if she was mad at someone. And sure enough there was this other driver on the left lane zigzagging (snaking in between cars) trying to beat this lady driver (who just decided to make the rightmost lane as the passing lane) so that they would be able to beat the other & see who would be the first to reach the other cars stopped at the red light ahead. It’s a good thing I am making a right & not be going in the same way they are. I wasn’t up to racing anyone that day.
Well that other driver was male, looked Asian if not Filipino. Oopps
So our score. 3-1. And the women drivers won today best of three series. Let’s see how they would do tomorrow.
And before I end this second discriminating post. I will leave you with this video & see for yourself how smart some women can be. And this is in America mind you, not the Philippines.
And okay one more. And this is to show that not all women are not smart, some are or some are really lucky. Okay, the smart man also did his part. Enjoy.